If I were a boy, even just for a day…

Daily prompt 20 is a little weird: Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be a member of the opposite sex for a day? What do you think life would be like?

First off, I haven’t ever wondered what life would be like if I were a guy, only perhaps that I’d be afraid of having to defend myself, since boys seem to scrap a lot to solve their differences (not a bad thing actually, it’s better than female passive-aggressiveness!)

But also, it would be quite hard to imagine what life for a day would be like without falling into the trap of assuming what men feel and think, and without accidentally being a little bit sexist. From living with a man for a while now, I know that if I were one for a day, these things would at least be in part true:

  • I’d get fed up of my testicles sticking to my legs on hot days…or on any day tbh.
  • And on that note. Itchiness.
  • I would get dead annoyed after a while when my painful morning wood just won’t go away, and I have important shit to do.
  • And on that note. Cock bulge.

I also know that if I were surrounded by a bunch of women, that I’d be really confused about what they talk about and how they act. If I had a girlfriend, I would be annoyed as hell about why she’s getting pissy at me because I forgot to wash the dishes. I’d also be weirded out that when I can see she’s upset, and I ask “what’s wrong?” she gets mad at me because I didn’t figure out why she’s upset from her answering “nothing.” And also, why she’s getting mad at me because I don’t want to massage her warm, moist feet after she’s been walking around on them all day.

I think men are quite unnecessarily shoved about mentally, because as well as being sensitive to women’s needs, they also need to play the hero, and the defender, and the lover, and the fighter. Women? We just need empowerment. But not be needy. But, okay sometimes that’s alright because on those days we’re acting like a mega-bitch, we can just say it’s because we’re due our periods, or we’re on our periods, or we’ve just come off a period (which can also sometimes make us feel weird), or, we can just blame everything on the contraceptive pill, even if we don’t take them.

If I were a guy, it would be a little exhausting. Women are exhausting. I should know, I am one. And I tire myself out, but at least half the time, I still know what the fuck is going on in my own head. Guys are often just spectators to women self-destructing and saying “this is your fault!” while also begging them to take care of them, because they feel “vulnerable.”

As Beyonce says: if I were a boy, I think I could understand how it feels to love a girl. But I don’t think it would make me a better man.




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