Currently Wasting Time: June Edition (Where I talk about Poo Paper and Vomit and Stuff)


In my last installment, I said I had just started reading Sarah Waters’ Fingersmith but I wasn’t really in the mood for it (hence why I picked up the atrocity that is The Family, see: last post).

I am now reading The Way of Shadows by Brent Weeks. It’s a book Dan lent me and I’m really liking it so far, although I have about 25 books on my book shelf I still need to read, I also borrow books from other people and buy new books (like Catching Fire and Mockingjay: the second and third books to The Hunger Games trilogy). So I should probably get out of that habit. I can’t help myself though. I could have a hundred books to read on my shelf but every time I go past a Waterstones I’m like “BOOKS! I SMELL BOOKS…LET’S BUY MORE BOOKS! WHO DOESN’T NEED BOOKS?” So yeah I should probably get that seen to.

I like reading Dan’s book collection because his taste is different to mine and it’s cheaper to borrow books but I must be careful with this one. I’ve borrowed two other books from him and because I like to read on my lunch hour, I put books in my bag (where they get all kinds of dust and crap on them). I did really well at trying to look after the last book I borrowed from him. I was about three-quarters of the way through, carefully making sure that the pages didn’t bend and that the cover was nice and clean. Then I was running a bath with the shower head (because the water runs faster) and as I was waiting for it to fill up, I decided to sit on the toilet seat and read my book. Of course, the dozens of baths I’ve run while reading my own books, the bath has filled up fine…however when reading Dan’s book, the shower head spins around in the bath, points at the wall and an arc of water refracts from the wall and all over me and the book, soaking it and wrinkling the pages. I tried to dry it with a hair dryer, but it didn’t work that well and he vowed to never lend me any book again. So lending me this one is a privilege, but watch something happen like a pigeon will fly through the window and crap on it or something.

In other book news, my parents recently got back from a 3 week holiday from Bali and gave me a Poo Paper bookmark as a souvenir. The bookmark is made from the dung of elephants, because they eat a lot of hay, so they extract the hay and dry it, making these “poo paper” things…it smells a bit like coffee (they also bought that cat-shit coffee back, and it doesn’t sound as nasty as it seems).


Sons of mother-fucking anarchy. Hot damn this season is good. I actually didn’t think it could get any better but it delivers again and again. Seriously, if badass bikers and super exciting storylines is your thing watch this show.

In films Dan and I recently watched The Edge with Anthony Hopkins. He gets lost in this forest and he and this guy are followed by a “man-eating bear” where arguably the best moment is when Hopkins says “I’m going to kill the motherfucker!”


The Sims 3: Supernatural. Still annoyed that you can’t turn zombies off in the settings but I found a hack where I built a fence around my crops (because of course, all zombies can’t resist a Great Quality apple tree) and when it got to full moon (this is when they appear for a night) I set my gate to “allow only my household.” It helps, but then I get zombie Sims moaning all night going “WAHH, zee-bah? Urrrrgh.” I might even set up a Sim blog just for the silly stuff like glitches and things, because there are so many. Currently my female sim goes naked every time she has a bath or shower, so she comes down the stairs to play with her children and she’s completely nude…apart from pixels of course.


Happy Street. I kinda really get into “play and go” games like Tiny Tower and Restaurant Story where I can build up something and occasionally go back to it to see if my Happy Street villagers have died or if my Mushroom Soup is ready.


I knew this would happen, I’d set up some goals for writing and not stick to them but it’s because I’m really into watching my shows and playing the Sims and stuff. “How come you never got a book published Grandma?” – “Well I really wanted to create an evil teenage Sim who hates everyone but then finds a partner and has kids and stuff. I also sort of kept having daughters and my old sim father really wanted a son before he died so…”

Laughing Uncontrollably At

When me and Dan are in the car, we’ll sometimes beep and wave at random strangers. The best one so far as been near Asda, where this guy doing something with his bike looked up open-mouthed and raised his hand in a very confused way.

Monthly Thought

There was a kid sick outside Asda and Dan went “urgh, hope that doesn’t go on my shoes.” Then the kid started crying (completely unrelated to what Dan said…I think :p) and I felt really sorry for him, like I wanted to help him out, but people were already doing that…I wanted to offer him some gum and water and ask him if he ate too quickly. Poor soul. He’ll probably never forget that.

But meh. In ten years time he’ll be throwing up in public from drinking all the time, so best he gets used to the shame now.




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